Well, with 2011 fast approaching it seems like the wedding will be here before I know it. In a few days I'll be in the same calendar year as Andy and I's wedding!!!

I still have yet to pin down a photographer or DJ which are two high priorities. I have a DJ I like so far but, once again, I'm nervous to go with my gut. I have talked to a few other DJs. Some are waaaaaaaay to cheese ball for me to even want to consider. The guy I'm looking at is very nice and offers some other things like lighting and a slideshow projector. I need to talk to him more and make a decision.

Over the holiday I'm going to take my sister to try on bridesmaid dresses. As she pointed out, this is the only part of the wedding "all about her". haha. She wishes. I'll pick a dress she hates on purpose. (I kid!)

I really am hoping to find 2-3 dresses and let my ladies choose their own. I don't need them as identical twins, just similar. I'm going to start with two places. I'm going to look at dresses at David's Bridal since there's one I really like. As much as I hate it, David's is convenient... I'm also going to find salon's that carry Mori Lee bridesmaid dresses.

My bridal shop carries Mori Lee and gives a small discount on the dresses since I purchased my wedding gown from them. Surprisingly, floor length gowns are in the same price range as David's Bridal?!?!!? Hopefully, one of these two options will turn something up. I'm still a little reluctant to do the bridal shop bridesmaid dresses because you have to order them and wait. David's is off the rack and a little more like a regular store which is comforting. I'm going to wait until I see what dresses they have before I stress about how to obtain the dresses!

And, that's where I stand. Things are going really well. On a side note, take my poll. I just read a post about a bride telling her ladies they couldn't wear their own engagement rings with the bridesmaid ensembles?! I've never heard of such a thing. Just curious where most brides fall on the spectrum!

If these don't get my bridesmaids excited for the wedding, I don't know what will!!!!

Lucky for me today is a Naughty and Nice wedding marathon on WE. That means alternating My Fair Wedding and Bridezillas episodes. Luckily, I've learned some valuable lessons. Brides always fight with their bridesmaids. There's always a bridesmaid who isn't involved enough, tried to steal the spotlight by looking to flashy in the dress the bride picked or dares to challenge the brides need for monogrammed toilet paper. But, these dumb brides are stuck with a MAJOR problem. If they kick out their bridesmaid, they'll have an uneven number and need to find a last minute, back up bridesmaid.

Not me. I can kick out two whole bridesmaids in the next 10 months before I have to even worry about backups! I have 7 but Andy only has 5. Whew. I can breath a sigh of relief now. I'm so happy I have wiggle room!

Let the bridesmaid survivor begin :)

Today I was bored so I thought I'd play around a little again with Andy and I's wedding registry. We sent out some Save the Dates to out of towners with our wedding website included, so I was trying to start getting a decent amount of info on our wedding website. One of these items will be links to our registries. Of course, I've put the registries last on the list because I'm not sure its really tactful to give our guests info on where to buy me a stand mixer before I give them info on how to get to our wedding.

But, I just can't help day dreaming about stand mixers! I've been baking like crazy, so its really on my mind. My whole cooking world will open up when I have a mixer and a food processor.
I'm also equally intrigued with the AMAZING accessories that are available for the KitchenAid Stand Mixer, especially the pasta rollers. Watch any cooking show for more than 2 minutes and you're bound to see these babies in action!

Andy starting looking at possible registry ideas with me. I charged him with researching coffee makers since he's the coffee drinker. We also started talking about things like a small deep fryer (we're southern now!) and a big outdoor turkey fryer/seafood steamer.

Then, I started to show him these beauties. But, I also showed him their price tag. $300. Roller and two cutters. I think he had heart failure. His exact reaction went something like "you need a $300 mixer and $300 worth of accessories to make pasta? How much pasta do you think you can import from Italy for $600?".

And boy does he have a point. Luckily, there are (slightly) more economical pasta extruders available so hopefully I can make pasta even if I don't match the Food Network stars exactly.

But, this all got me thinking if people actually use their wedding gifts. I really like to think that since I enjoy cooking already that I will definitely put these too good use. But, it seems like EVERYONE registers for a mixer. Does the KitchenAid mixer have magical properties that turns every new bride into a Martha Stewart?

I'm going to venture a guess that they're more status symbol then anything else. In fact, their iconic nature is chronicled in the Kitchen Gadgets post on Stuff White People Like.

What are the most ridiculous items you've seen on a registry? I know I've heard of people putting items on their registries, not because they think someone will actually buy it, but because they get a discount on all incomplete registry items.  What was the worst wedding gift you've received? It seems like everyone gets something unexpected.

I can't help but sharing a story Amanda told me about registries. Its now standard practice to get scanner "guns" at stores when you register in person, like Target. What the poor girl didn't know was that he fiance scanned packs of condoms but I guess she quickly realized when every shower gift included a box of condoms.

I'll leave you with some funny registry items I've seen on wedding forum posts:
fire extinguishers (gotta be safe!)
Kevlar motorcycle pants
Twinkies (once you're married I guess you can let yourself go!)
Bump Its (we all need Big Happy Hair)
Nose Hair Trimmer (ew!)
$89 salt grinder
$130 coasters

After watching some awful episodes of Bridezillas and reading far too many "how to kick out a bridesmaid?" posts on Wedding Bee, I've decided to give a little opinion on my expectations for bridesmaids. Seems like there are an awful lot of brides out there that  have very different expectations of bridesmaids and some bridesmaid who are just way over the top.

I really don't aspire to be a control freak and I honestly think its pretty unfair of any bride to demand anything. The way I see it, its Andy and I's wedding so its our job to take care of the work. If our friends and family offer their help, then by all means, I'll take it. But, I will not ask my friends to be in my wedding and then demand them to do all the work. My philosophy is to try to include my family and bridesmaids in the planning by letting them know I'm doing but letting them pipe up when they're interested.

I have 7 bridesmaids.
1. 3rd year of doctorate in Audiology
2. Master's here at the Sea Lab
3. High school teacher and Pregnant!
4. master's in teaching + student teaching
5. full time job and facing a cross country move in early summer and wife to a full time doctoral student
6. PhD program
7. full time state government job and also has a husband working full time on a phd

Seriously, look at this list, what right do I have to demand ANYTHING of these women? Also, the reason I love all of them so much is because they're all smart, successful and highly motivated. There is no way my floral choices will EVER be more important than all that is going on in their lives.

So, in my humble opinion I present you my thoughts on what a bridesmaid is "required" to do when she accepts her position.

- show up to the wedding and rehearsal. Showers, bachelorette parties are optional. I can't believe the number of postings I've seen online where ladies have said "you'll plan my bachelorette party and you'll plan my shower". Those are parties people can throw you if they want.  I don't think its the bridesmaids responsibility to foot the bill of that kind of party. If they want too, its one thing but far to many people expect this. "we're such good friends, now throw me parties" never really works for me! Also, this doesn't have to be the Maid of Honor. And don't fight with each other over who "has" to throw the party.

- In fact, this deserves its own bullet. Don't fight with the other bridesmaids. I can't believe when I hear this happens. Don't!

- wear whatever dress is chosen, order it promptly even if you think 9 months in advance is absurd. Weddings are absurd, get used to it. Although, I thoroughly encourage brides to give their girls some choice and input. Don't try to put your 38DDDDD bride in a strapless gown and you'll probably have an easier time getting her to order it on time. Also, an eggplant a-line dress is never re-wearable, so don't corner your bridesmaids trying to get them to tell you what's the most re-wearable because none of them are.

- Support the bride on her big day. This means be the kind of friend you've always been. This doesn't mean she's suddenly obligated to do a million extra errands and field crying 2am phone calls weekly. I know your life didn't revolve around me before I got engaged so I don't expect it too now either. I choose you because you've always supported me, this shouldn't be a new obligation!

-have fun! If you don't have fun, I'll be sad.

And that's it. If a bridesmaid doesn't want to help glue a billion sequins onto menu cards, too bad. If she doesn't want to compare 15 different chinese lanterns on varying websites don't be surprised either! Bridesmaids aren't wedding slaves. Chances are your bridesmaids will be very excited for some things, mine certainly are. But, I'm also not offended when they're not giddy about every little detail, after all, it is my wedding not theirs!

I wish they'd do a reality show on bridesmaids... that'd be pretty good. Until then, maybe I'll see if I can make Shanna watch 27 dresses with me. She's the only one close enough to inflict this torture... lucky Shanna.

Anyone got an good bridesmaid stories? Ya know, you can comment with fake names ;)

Here's a few if you enjoy the whole Mean Girls thing...
They won't go dress shopping
Sneaky sneaky way to get new "bridesmaids"
And lastly, a support group thread for all those brides who have had to pick out a bridesmaid (affectionately called BM's on wedding bee)

LOSE WEIGHT!

Doesn't every bride do this? Of course, as soon as I got engaged I thought "damn, I should loose some weight". Actually, I'd been thinking that for a while but the fact that cooking is like my #1 hobby has really dampened that. How can I bake red velvet cake and then NOT eat it.

A couple weeks after Andy and I got engaged I decided I would join Weight Watchers online. I just have no will power and need something to keep me honest. Initially, it worked wonders. In the first month I lost about 10 pounds. Then, it stopped.

Actually, I'll be honest, I stopped trying. I went to LA, we went to Dan and Teresa's wedding, we went to New Orleans, I went to Maryland. I discuss with my dear friend Becky all the time the phenomenon where once you fall off the diet bandwagon for the week, its immediately "well, I screwed up already this week so I'll just start over next week" and then pig out the rest of the week because hey, you already failed, lets make it worthwhile.

Now that things are a little less crazy I've revamped my efforts. Declaring them to the blogosphere is another effort to keep myself honest.

I've been more aware of what I eat and I'm trying to do a better job of meal planning. When I don't map out healthy meals I end up eating crap. I'm also trying to up my activity level by doing more workouts. I've got an arsenal of DVD's and I'm working on jogging again. Another friend from the lab Lanaya is also joined the weight watchers band wagon so we're trying to be healthy and go for a 3 mile walk after lunch too. We've done it all this week and its been really nice.

I think that already finding a dress that looks good on me at my current weight is actually motivating. If I had a bad dress experience and had felt like there was nothing that would look good without loosing weight I'd be under a lot of pressure. Now I'm just excited to get a little healthier since that's always a good goal. And the wedding is a nice motivator!

This weekend will be a big test of my self control, its our annual Wine and Cheese Party. I've been saving up my weekly points and working out lots this week but I still cannot eat my own body weight in cheese. That is easier said than done :)

 After my last post about being nervous about vendors, I decided to seek some advice from other brides who'd been married at the Ezell House. Maybe they could offer advice on my venue? Perhaps in hindsight they're have some words of wisdom.

One problem... I don't know anyone who is an Ezell House bride!

I must admit, I am a complete Facebook stalker. I quickly went on Facebook and looked up a couple photographers in the area. Next, I sorted through their photos for pictures of the Ezell House and then I promptly sent FB messages to a couple of brides in the photos! I know, sort of weird. But, I don't know anyone  else to give me an honest opinion on the venue so I thought soliciting some anonymous advice would be a good thing.

It took me a while to draft up a non-creepy message asking the brides some advice. But, it worked! I got two replies last night! And, now, a big sigh of relief. Both brides said their days went perfectly. Funny though, the one bride told me her only issue was with Port City Rental. Remember them with their billion dollar teal linens and $250 christmas lights? I had a chance to ask them some pointed questions and I'm very satisfied that I made a good choice!

Now, the one girl I messaged was actually whose wedding I went to see being set up with Andy and Shanna when we were trying to make a decision. Obviously, she doesn't know me, we just saw her in passing while she was doing photos. At the time I remember telling Shanna how I thought she had a nice dress.

Fast forward to yesterday. While in the midst of my facebook stalking, I kept looking at this bride's photos on the photographer's FB page for inspiration. Her wedding was in front of the fountain and set up exactly how I'd envisioned my ceremony so her pictures are helpful in getting an ideas for my wedding. But, I kept looking at her dress... then it dawned on me.... THAT'S MY DRESS! I called Shanna over (we share an office at school) and she confirmed. The bride I FB stalked about her wedding at the Ezell House is also my dress twin!

Well, the good thing is that at least I know we have similar tastes since we picked the same venue and dress. She gave the venue a rave review so this must be a good sign. And, I know what my dress looks like on a person in front of the house (I'm not sure why that matters).

And here is a crappy dressing room picture of the top of my dress. I assure you that this sweetheart neckline is indeed the same!

Note: I have actually tried on a veil, I just don't love it. I also don't love my hair down which is funny because I usually prefer it that way... ah, decisions for another day!

So, am I crazy for all this facebook stalking? I know I already booked the place so there's no backing out, I just felt like maybe there'd be some red flags to make sure I addressed before my big day. Any of you that are married or have experience, how did you pick a venue?